Her Name is Worthy

Her name is Worthy, you know.

She is a daughter, a mother, a sister, a friend.

Mixed in all of those things, though, is Worthy.

I've been looking at my daughter a lot lately, as every new mom should, and I can't help but see her worth. She has a smile that lights up the darkest rooms (and hearts) and can bait you with one swish of her long eye lashes. She is special, full of purpose, and she MATTERS.


To me her name is Worthy.

So is my name. I see that when I look at her.

So is your name. I see that when I look at her, too.

It's amazing to me that such a little human can teach so many lessons to this Momma heart. When I look at her I want her to feel loved, to feel wanted, to feel important. Her response to those things show's me that I am those things to her. Her love for me makes me want more for her. I want people to always treat her kindly to always scream "BABY YOU ARE WORTH IT!"


But then I think... Worth what??


What is she teaching me that she, myself, and you are worthy of?


We are worthy of pursuit, my friend. We shouldn't be the only ones reaching out to relationships with no reciprocation. We shouldn't feel disposable or only worth love when it's convenient or when we are useful.


We are worthy of relationships. I find that we don't always accept that when we consider our age, our perspective of beauty, financial status, etc. I'm a daughter and I'm worthy of pursuit by my parents. Harper is a granddaughter and she is worthy of pursuit by her grandparents. You and I are friends to people- and it's okay to expect people to be friends to us in response.


We are also worthy of time. Time for visits and time for phone calls. I know schedules can be busy (believe me, my schedule is so crazy right now I can barely stand it) but the point of schedules is to SCHEDULE. Plan time for people. Call someone in the car driving. Plan time to do a drive-by-drop-off of something that says, "Hey, I love you even though I'm busy."
Life can make time investments difficult. We don't have a car right now and figuring out how to rent cars to see family, take an Uber when someone has a birthday isn't easy (and sometimes it's not possible.) But I can call, I can text, I can send a gift and let them know I value them and AS SOON AS I AM ABLE they are at the top of my scheduling priorities. Because they have worth to me I will make it happen- it may take money to get to them but I'm going to get to them. In the mean time, though, they are more than welcome to come to me (and they should try. It's okay for me to expect them to try.) They are worthy of that. I am worthy of that. Harper is worthy of that. YOU are worthy of that.


I guess what I'm trying to say is it's not okay to accept the 90% give and 10% take. Not in the important relationships. I can't deny that there are people in my world that are takers. They don't call unless called. They don't respond to texts often and when they do it's very little. They don't check up, they don't check-in, they just don't. It didn't seem to matter as much before.


But today... Today it does.


I looked at my daughter today and my heart was heavy. Heavy because there are people that should be calling to ask about her, wanting to see her pictures, wanting to FaceTime and listen to her "talk" or cry. People should be buying her pointless gifts because they were thinking about her. Her name should be Worthy to them. Today, however, I realized it wasn't. You know why it wasn't? Because. Of. Me.


Because of me people don't pursue her. I thought a lack of pursuit of me was okay until I realized that. 


Friend... it isn't.


It isn't okay that people don't want to reciprocate relationship efforts. It's not okay because of Harper. AND it's not okay because of me.


Harper's name is Worthy, but so is mine.


So. Is. Yours.


We can't let ourselves only give 90% forever. At some point we need to evaluate. Relationships matter and we need to give, and I will teach my daughter to give. I will also teach her that there are some relationships that you should be receiving from as well- you are worth that.

Dear ladies (and gents),

Let the fact that we show others value remind us that we have value as well. Scripture spells out that we have worth, that we matter, and we should be valued. I'm sorry that other's don't always see it. I see it. Maybe if we start to see it in each other then we will start to recognize it in ourselves.

Dear receivers of our love,

Don't take us for granted. My heart, my daughters heart, is worth your pursuit. It's not that hard. A text, a call, a response; it's just not that difficult. If you love me then love me. If you don't then help me know to shift my primary focus to the ones who do.

Let me be clear- I know that many times our lives require us to be self-sacrificing, to serve, and to love with no expectation. That's not the relationships I'm speaking of today. Today I'm talking about the friends, the parents, the grandparents, the siblings. We all know who we are in this scenario. If we are the 10% let's give more. If we are the 90% let's evaluate, communicate, and readjust. Let's remember each others worth, folks. It really shouldn't be that hard.


I'm looking at my daughter again. Trust me, when it comes to us, if you aren't looking at her too, if you aren't pursuing her, then you are missing out. She is the greatest. I'll never let her believe otherwise.