Say What?!

"Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me."

I can remember being taught that song by kindergarten teachers, parents, older cousins... It was the anthem on the playground in elementary school. And boy did I have to use it A LOT...

One of the WORST things anyone ever said about me on that playground was about how I had a crush on the snotty nosed freckled boy who always cried for his mom. It was devastating... because I liked the blonde headed tan boy who always got in trouble.

Kids are so cruel.

Thinking back though, I remember kids throwing sticks and hitting me (conflict resolution for a 6 year old is pretty dangerous) and honestly... I don't remember what 99% of those fights were about... But I remember when someone started the rumor about me liking the nerdy boy so vividly... I'm still mad at the little girl who started it. Jerk.I think she just wanted him all to herself. Whatevs...

Words hurt... dangit. Words hurt A LOT!

Those wounds and mean words stuck with me for so long... Did you know that some people stopped being my friend all because of a lie? And I hurt the little freckled boys feelings because I had to loudly exclaim 'NUH UH!! I DON'T LIKE HIIIIIIIM!!" And then the boy that I liked never talked to me again and he lived on my street so that was a big deal.

You know what?! Sometimes I still feel like that little girl on the playground.

I hear stories about me that have been passed around to SOO MANY people before I catch wind of it and it has caused broken relationships, people placing a false identity/or character make-up of me. In some circles... words have ruined my reputation.

And you know what I've learned?! Most of what was said... it was a lie. Not even an ounce of truth.

So much damage just to have a little bit of juicy gossip about someone else.

Growing up in the church I remember so many sermons about stealing, and drugs, sex before marriage, and lying.

But rarely gossip.

You know which of those sins I've seen do the most damage?

Gossip.

I was thinking about it today- people THRIVE off of gossip. Because if I can tell someone about someone else's junk (real or made up) I don't look as bad to the people I'm talking to.

But if you look behind you on the path that the gossip train paved- there are way too many casualties.

I know I've bought into the gossip train way too many times to count. I've hurt so many and threw daggers at my fair share of reputations...

But why?? It didn't benefit me... and you know what I learned??

"Those who gossip to you will gossip about you."

And we get SO mad when the gossip is turned back on us. Have you ever had someone gossip about you saying that you were gossiping??? Imagine the confusion when you try to get angry with a person for doing what you did. Honestly... that's what you just have to work out with Jesus because then we would have to wrestle with being a hypocrite- and that's a whole other post. Lol

Here's my point- Words hurt worse than a physical beating.

If Jesus himself said that he didn't come into the world to condemn it but to love it- I don't think we should feel the right to do more than Him. John 3:17

And if you feel the need to talk about someone... speak truth about them. I don't mean FACTS about them... I mean truth. If you're wondering what that is... Check out this math equation.

God= Love  1 John 4:8

God= Jesus John 10:30

Love= Jesus= the Way, the TRUTH, and the Life John 14:6

So if all of those are the same thing...

Truth= the Way, Life, and ultimately Jesus.

So... Truth= Love

So, when trying to figure out what the truth is about someone ask yourself this:

• Does what I'm saying show someone the way to walk? Are my words a positive example of a disciple of Jesus?
• Do my words speak life to and over someone? Or am I cursing them and speaking death?
• Do I sound like Jesus? Am I speaking out of the love that's mentioned in 1 Corinthians 13? Or am I trying to be the judge and the jury and throw condemnation towards the person I'm speaking about

Words hurt, my friends. And we are called to encourage and strengthen and empower ALL those around us. Not just friends, and family... but enemies as well.

So I leave you with these simple words-

"If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."